We are only ever half awake. Only half aware, one foot in today and three nervous steps into the fog of tomorrow. Tell me, why is it that every day is shorter than the last. Every year gets faster, faster, faster and we try our best to hold onto the fuzzy outlines of the future we dream for ourselves but sometimes it feels that we have been walking forever, and the fog is incessant and unforgiving as it only grants us a vague idea of what we may encounter next. We close our eyes at night and our minds light on fire with wants, worries, needs, love, desire, loss. We are so full of life at the end of each day its hard to really imagine there being another waiting on the other side of each night.
So we sleep, and we wait for another chance to grow, to get things right. We wake to roll over in bed and be greeted by someone we love or inhale another breath of cold winter air. We wake to try again, and we all deserve to try again. We fill our cups with hope every morning. We live to experience, to feel something greater than reality is really able to supply us. Yes, we are only ever half awake, only able to see with two eyes and feel what is in front of us but with each blink we begin again and every dream we are lucky enough to dream is a blessing. Every sliver of sunlight that warms us is a gift, as is every pomegranate seed, clever web comic, thoughtful observation, scarf around our neck, call from home, scenic viewpoint, fresh pair of socks, handshake, or any number of overlooked wonders of every day life.
We do our best to give thanks, to understand every opinion, to feel every feeling, but it’s hard to accomplish and appreciate everything that is great in this life every day, all at once. So at the end of each year we often try to search ourselves for some new clue, some new piece of the puzzle we may have previously overlooked. We look back at everything that was learned, felt, imagined, created, and experienced and remember that tonight, when we go to sleep, we still dream the same dreams and wake with the same lofty goals and expectations for ourselves. We live in unison and it’s important to remember that even at our worst we do our best. Tomorrow, more than ever before, we have to remember that everything in this world has a balancing point. I find myself living this simple philosophy and applying it to every decision, no matter how small. Stay thankful, stay aware, and stay balanced. It’s the only way we will manage to make it through happy enough to feel like we deserve to appreciate the gifts that we are given each day.
Stay just hungry enough to know you love the taste of your favorite foods. Stay messy enough to know that perfection can never honestly be found. Stay cold enough to remember the comfort of being warm. Stay naive enough to feel disappointment. Stay calm enough to feel the rush of a surprise. Stay balanced, stay open to anything, and stay awake just long enough to fall back asleep.
I feel like I am taking a risk any time I ever post anything of this sort, makes me anxious because most of the time I fear it only makes sense somehow in my own mind. But I share anyway, despite the fears because whats the point in hiding it? Nothing ever happens just by sitting around. That said, try not to let the pressure of a new year fool you. It really is just another day. Let’s simply press on, happy that we made it through another year, and do the best we can to remain happy and balanced in the year to come.
These photos were taken recently on the coast of North Carolina. I am a sucker for a good path and I figured now, on the eve of a new year would be the perfect time to share them. Happy new year everyone, here’s to a great 2013!